Finding Myself · Goals · The Future

Feeling Pressured to Grow Up

We are all different. We do not all have the same goals, the same wishes, and the same outlook on life. This does not mean one is better than the other, this simply means we should try to see the world in others’ points of view.

That being said, have any of you felt pressured to grow up? Have you felt pressured to conform to what everyone else is doing in their lives? I know I have, and I know we aren’t the only ones.

Backstory: I am 22 years old, I have been in a relationship for 7 years, I still live at home with my mom, and I do not feel ready to leave the nest.

I always get bombarded with the questions about marriage, moving out, buying a car, when I want kids, and why my boyfriend hasn’t proposed yet. As a university student, I am just not ready for these things, and I have come to the realization that it is OK! We all grow at our own pace, we deal with things differently, and we all have our own paths laid out for ourselves. I want to continue with school, go on for my PhD, and slowly settle in to “adulthood”. Many friends of mine are starting to get into their careers, want to save to buy houses, want to get married, and want to have children in the next couple years. At times, it is discouraging seeing how my friends are settling into their lives and I am still sitting here in school barely able to afford my coffees for the week with my part time job. I sometimes wonder if I am holding my boyfriend back because we won’t be able to purchase a house or really get our lives started together until I am finished my schooling. As down as I feel some days, I always remind myself that these are my goals. Just because my friends have different goals, does not mean I should look down on my own. I should embrace the process of growing at my own pace; never force yourself into situations or back out of your dreams just because your path deviates from everyone else’s. That is what makes you unique, what makes you you.

Moral of the story: Do not worry about what others think you should be doing. Pursue your hopes and dreams, and everything will come together at one point or another. Keep pushing – as winding and bumpy the path may be, just remember you chose it for a reason 🙂

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5 thoughts on “Feeling Pressured to Grow Up

  1. Amazing post! I think it’s so important to do things at your own pace. I’m with you in that I’m not ready for marriage, kids, and adulthood in general. Keep on track with YOUR goals and I’m sure you will be happy with the outcome!

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  2. Thank you for sharing. And I definitely feel the pressure to grow up. Plus, for me to see how most of my friends are entering ‘adulthood’ seemingly without me can feel discouraging. But I try to keep in mind everyone has their own path to follow. Great Post!

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  3. A lot of my friends are at completely different stages in their lives. Some are still living at home and have yet to finish high school, while others already have completed their college programs and landed jobs in their field. Although I will graduating in a month, I am not done with school beginning a graduate program in September. It’s nice to learn that I am not the only one at a different spot in life than people I know. Thanks for the reassurance that everyone’s path is different and that that’s okay! Great post 🙂

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